Varsity 2012

Our awesome Varsity compilation video. Naturally, our club beat Cambridge for the 5th year running. Can you hear the chants of "Oxford! Oxford! Oxford!"? Epic. I appear at round about 3:10 with one of my favourite kicks. Unfortunately, I didn't do so hot this time. People are really nice and say "No, no that was good." But I think its one of those things that you would know yourself, not-quite-so deep down, wether it was good or not. Also, not to sound corny but I quite like the team spirit we've got going... so in the end, I'm just glad we won. And there's always next year.

Also, I know, I've been really absent lately. But you know what they say, "Only good girls keep diaries (or blogs I suppose), the bad girls don't have the time." =) Although in my case, being bad just means putting off tute work to watch an episode of Friends... Ok, totally lame announcements over.

I Object

In reference to this.

I feel the need to say this: That Bumiputera status is very obviously not for Malays and it probably never has been. It was, in its essence, designed to protect the rights of the people of Malaysia. We are Malaysian Chinese, we are 4th/5th generation maybe more. We should be Bumiputera. How many centuries do you have to live on a land before you are a part of it? We fought your wars, we helped pave the way to independence, we helped build a country from scratch, we paid our taxes, we paid our dues. Tanah tumpahnya darahku so to speak. And I think that makes us as, if not more, Malaysian than any Thai descendants, regardless of their religion, profess to be. To answer all your questions from BTN; we are Malaysian before we are Chinese and no, we do not put religion or race ahead of country and yes, maybe that is your problem.

God Bless The Broken Road

For a very long time; this was one of my favourite songs:

Every long lost dream, led me to where you are,
Others who broke my heart, they were like Northern stars,
Pointing me on my way, into your loving arms
This much I know is true;
That God bless the broken road that lead me straight to you.


-Bless The Broken Road, Rascal Flatts-

We're never 'ready' no matter how many times we say we are, no matter how many times it has actually happened to us. In fact, its probably one of those things which counterintuitively get harder with experience - getting betrayed. But it, like life, happens. Usually when you least expect it. Sometimes we love the wrong people. And that doesn't make us stupid, or silly or crazy despite what some people might say.

The world is full of bastards. I should know, I've dated many of them. Get used to it. People will hurt you, bend you, try and break you. And one day you will thank them for it. Because despite what people may think, growing up is not a linear function. Some days you grow more than others - the day someone rips up your heart and stomps all over it without ever touching you, the day someone you love brushes past you on the street, the day someone who used to love you says "It meant nothing.", the day you wake up not wanting to move, but you do; and the day you realise that you are the better (wo)man.

In the words of one Steve Jobs "its hard to connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking back." So right now, it looks like the end of the road, it looks like you'll never be able to move forward, it looks like a wrong turn, a bad detour - but its just a piece of the puzzle. One day you'll look back on the broken road and say "God bless."

Back To Basics

Its a pity how someone you hate can make you hate something you love. I haven't done Taekwon-Do in 3 years following 'creative differences' and 'irreconcilable differences' with some parties. But recently, I decided to give up on my half hearted attempts at Latin dance and go back to using my feet the way they were meant to be used - to inflict pain.

Kidding... Sort of. There's something very satisfying about landing a perfect kick on someone's head.

And before you yell "SOCIOPATH" and call the cops, here's group picture from my first OUTKD outing to Warwick on Saturday.

I won a medal! Yes, I know its only a bronze medal. It is ever so slightly disappointing. But I also feel good about it - I'm getting back into something I enjoy, making loads of wonderful new friends and no one is going to stop me =)

Did You Hear?

I don't think I'm very adult at all because every time someone dies, even though its someone I'm not close to; I am struck with a deep, profound sense of mortality. And in a way I feel a little bad, taking someone's tragedy as the basis of my own realizations. But we all need to be reminded; that we are not indestructible, infallible, impervious.

We're so young that we think of life as the default state... of death as something that happens to other people, elsewhere in the world and you, of course but elsewhere in time. Never now.

Then one day you're walking down the street to the post office and you bump into a friend who asks you in a loud whisper (because one should always speak in a hushed tones when talking about these things) "DID YOU HEAR?" And it hits you; in the middle of the busy street, people streaming around you as you grapple with this new piece of information, fumbling with it in your hands like an awkward, unwanted parcel. You obligately thank the bearer.

"Thank you for telling me," you say, as if you really mean it.

Afterwards, they go on their way, but you're not angry because they've shared a little of that burden with you. Maybe they had to, maybe it gets to them too - causes that feeling in the pit of your stomach which isn't really a feeling at all because its just... hollow. Empty. Profound in its nothingness. You stand there ever so slightly bewildered as the world moves on around you, the crumpled letter in your hand, having forgotten where you were headed.

And then you take a deep breath if only to try and regain the beat your heart skipped. Then you turn towards the crowd and carry on your way. Because what else can we do; but keep calm and carry on?